King Solomon in chapter three of the Book of Ecclesiastes writes, “To everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under heaven…” The Byrds agreed and sang, “To everything, turn, turn, turn. There is a season, turn, turn, turn. And a time to every purpose under heaven.” Everyone is aware of change- young and old- life truly is a series of seasons. We can postpone, fear and protest change, but we cannot stop it. I have found that change is best experienced in small steps with a firm foundation.
How does this apply to toddlerhood? From my perspective, toddlers change every day and they are keenly aware of the changes within themselves and around them. The V5 have noted that the leaves are changing from Lily-Green to Theo-Orange, Mae-Yellow, Bella-Purple and Ellie-Pink. They also have noticed that it’s windy outside and “told,” too. Our little munchkins have prompted many changes in the last month and have led us through most of them gracefully.
Bowls to Plates
The V5 have been eating from a bowl for a very long time. We welcomed the idea of transitioning to plates for lunch and dinner because it would teach them to pace themselves. Lily was previously wolfing down her food; she is known to be quite the snake at the table and not chew one bite. But, now she has slowed down to keep pace with her sibs.
It also provides the opportunity to demonstrate what a healthy meal looks like and the food groups present. Chef Theo caught on right away and enjoys demonstrating is well-balanced meal (Meat, Toast and Matoes). The kids have also become very engaged in the meal planning and preparation process. At lunch and dinner, we ask what they would like and each get to choose 1 item; it helps that there are five food groups. Then my little sous chefs walk me through each step of the process. Their favorite meals are:
- egg, toast, avocado, spinach and applesauce
- meat, orange potatoes, zucchini and oranges
Diapers to Pull-ups
As you know we are Potty Training Boot Camp veterans. We have experienced two tours. Since the second tour, the V5 have been self-initiating 2-3 trips to the potty each day. Elliott, Mae and Bella are really good at anticipating pee-pee and poo-poo; Lily loves to try and is still learning the internal sensations; Theo enjoys sitting on the big-boy potty. Many potty-training gurus discourage Pull-ups because they are essentially diapers. But, we like them because it gives the kids the independence to try to go to the potty on their own and saves lots of messes.
Cribs to Toddler Beds
When is it time to transition to a toddler bed? I’m not sure there is a best time, but most recommend to introduce them when the crib becomes unsafe. For us, this was when at least two were able to climb out of their cribs and they were able to in the middle of the night. Our transition was quick- all at once. Bella was the first to escape. With great grace she leapt out like an Olympic pole vaulter. We bought ourselves time by lowering her mattress to the floor. Theo was next and launched himself out of the bed in the middle of the night while demanding snuggles. The next day, we chose to transition to toddler beds at nap time. Warning: this change requires consistency and strong boundaries. Prepare a safe room that they can explore in the middle of the night, expect a sleepless night full of tantrums, and do not go back. Once the door is closed, let them figure it out.
A New House
The biggest transition on the horizon is our move to Sun Prairie, specifically the township of Bristol. The kids are really looking forward to the move and I think it is because they know that it is for the better. We talk about the “new house” with great positivity. They have visited and seen how much space they will have to learn and play. We look forward to closing on December 7th!
Tips to Ease Transition
As I noted earlier, change can be quite difficult but I believe there are many things we can do, specifically parents can do, to ease transition for their children.
- Over-Communicate. We practice over-communication with anything new on a daily basis. We have found that the kids do very well when they know what is coming. Whether it is consequences or the day’s events, we see fewer tantrums when they know what’s next. I also say over-communicate, because to an adult it can sound silly to lay out basic steps, like, “when you are doing eating, we will scrape our plates once and then take them to the sink.” But, to a child these are important because otherwise they may not understand why they can’t sit at the table and lick their plates for 10 minutes after the meal (Cough- Ellie- Cough Cough).
- Take it slow. Avoid turning a child’s world upside-down. I truly believe that children change a little bit every day, so they are already learning to experience the world a little different every time they wake. Be careful with self-imposed changes, such as those that we have described above. I have to remind myself that small steps also lead to big changes. One example is the transition from two naps to one. Most recommend making this change 10 minutes at a time versus all at once.
- Lead by Example. If change is scary for the parent, I believe the child will sense that fear, too. I will openly admit that I am not good at change. But, I am open to trying to become better at it. I like order, sequence and schedules and transitions do not always allow for this. Therefore, as I learn to accept change and ease transition I hope to role model a healthy way to handle change for my children. Because change is new, sometimes spontaneous and can be open-ended, I have found a firm foundation of what is known is important to me. Therefore, I try to provide a firm foundation for my children when we are transitioning, such as my great love for them and the simple reminder that everything is going to be okay.
Fun Finish… Sneak peek into Minion Mansion: Halloween 2015